Ammonia Avenue - A continuation of questiosn

The twists and complications of the human mind are fuel for a lot of controversy. We are each different, each unique and each beautiful but we each have a dark side too.

“Is there no sign of light as we stand in the darkness?

Watching the sun arise

Is there no sign of life as we gaze at the waters?

Into the strangers eyes”

In a recent conversation with a friend i realized that most of us meet the right people at the wrong time or the wrong people at the right time. Such is life.
Love seems to become more n more elusive and complicated as we age. Expectations increases.


‘And who are we to criticize or scorn the things that they do?

For we shall seek and we shall find ammonia avenue”
Can we, with all our personal diversity ever find someone to fit the grooves exactly? Or do we need to file the edges down and accommodate.
Is love and marriage synonymous with compromise?


“If we call for the proof and we question the answers

Only the doubt will grow

Are we blind to the truth or a sign to believe in?

Only the wise will know”
Then again, isn’t our own company enough to pass off as companionship? Or are we in our hearts looking for a hand to hold?


“And word by word they handed down the light that shines today

And those who came at first to scoff, remained behind to pray”
I admit today that I’d love to be held. Love to be held close and love to be loved.. And for all those who believe love is a sham or an illusion, i guess you have never really known what it is to truly give love.


“When you can’t hear the rhyme and you can’t see the reason

Why should the hope remain?

For a man will be tired and his soul will grow weary

Living his life in vain”
He assigns all of us a purpose before we receive a physical form. Mine is to love people. To bring a smile or a laugh.. To take away a little pain, to give hope. And so, with outstretched arms i wait to embrace anyone who is willing to be loved.



“And who are we to justify the right in all we do?

Until we seek until we find ammonia avenue”
Is this the right path for everyone? Is it necessary for everyone to find their purpose? Why do people change? Why is it acceptable when people’s belief systems change in the blink of an eye? Yet, everything we do is right according to us. Even if it isn’t, it is the choice we make and we manage to justify our actions

‘Through all the doubt somehow they knew

And stone by stone they built it high

Until the sun broke through

A ray of hope, a shining light ammonia avenue’
And stone by stone we build these walls until we block out even the few that matter. We shield our souls and feelings believing that exposure will cause more damage. We don’t trust, we don’t see, we stop feeling.
And then when we are sure that all is lost, He makes the light shine through. He sends us a miracle that changes it all. The acceptance of that change is a choice again… those who grab that hand get a second chance. Those who don’t slowly crumble right from the core.

nature

Dappled in different shades of green,

with lots of dots of blue, pink and yellow,

The generally imposing mountain side,

today seems so much more mellow.

Rivers of blue and diamond drops,

rolled down the side in streams,

And every single way i looked,

was like a scene right out of my dreams.

Powdery blue, but pregnant with rain,

the clouds seem ready to burst

To continue their job of feeding the streams,

that they have for so long nursed.

Ever loving is she and forgiving too,

for we have been nasty and mean,

By littering here and dirtying there

till the earth no longer seems to have a spot clean.

I pray every day that this mercy continues,

that we can be spared a situation so dour,

while battling on to make it known

that its all bout the birds and the bees and the flower.

Us

As I lie in the darkness, alone with my head,
These thoughts haunt me and I am so scared.
But so prisitne are they, in every way,
That my eyes film over and my soul is bared.

They cut through the darkness, these sounds so loud
I know not what to do but hide.
But how can I hide these beautiful thoughts
Of you, and of me, by your side

give me the acceptance

When it starts to bleed again, the eyes cannot but help accompanying it, turning each red drop to the scathing liquid, that flows out.

Of all that is lost, and the only amongst those i wished i still had.

It aches and begs for acceptance.

It is not asking much, i know that.

And yet each drop burns my cheeks and rips my heart and rips my heart apart, just a little wider.

Please take away the pain,

Please give me the only acceptance I want. I can fight for the rest.

But i cannot fight anymore, for the one thing I think is perfect for me.

Loss

Sometimes the people you hardly know, manage to touch, impact and mold your life in great ways.

He was one of them.

Only a year of brief interaction and he has left me with a vision and a mission

I saw myself and deemed myself capable, through his eyes.

Dear God, Please keep him happy.

Big pink cherubic face, with the most beautiful grey eyes. a voice that boomed with authority, yet so gentle.

John, i miss you.

R.I.P